This morning at approximately 7 he was admitted into the Intensive Care Unit (ICU)
Apparently after his chemotherapy session he collapsed. After a fit of non stop coughing and inability to breathe, he fainted. He was brought into a surgery and his heart beat actually stopped for 20 whole minutes!!
I only know of it at 3 in the evening.
I dropped everything else, my class, my test and rushed to go and see him.
Needless to say I can't stop my tears from running looking at his condition.
I still can't believe this is happening.
I never thought I'd see him lying lifelessly on the bed.
I never thought I'd see him in ICU.
I never thought I'd cry for him because of this.
I don't want to~ I really don't want to~
It breaks my heart that I can't see him talking
It breaks my heart that I can't see him smiling, laughing, joking
It breaks my heart that he's not responding to anything I say or do
It breaks my heart that he's not waking up.
It breaks my heart to see his mom trying to tough it up.
It breaks my heart to see her try so hard to stay calm
It breaks my heart to see his macho guy friends break down and cry
It breaks my heart to see them to try so hard not to.
Some say, if it is meant for him to go, it is better for him to go quickly, because that way, he won't suffer as much....
BUT I DON'T WANT IT!!!
He has to live!
He has to get well!
He just has to!!!
There's still a lot I want to say
There's still a lot I want to share
There's still a lot for him to do
There's still a whole future in front of him...
So please Irsyad,
Please Wake UP
Please be well.
Please~~~
Sincerely,
p/s: Dear readers, right now he desperately need your prayers. Please, pray for him, so that he'd be back as healthy as he was....
I read the post you blogged about him, I didn't comment, tears flow, I can't bear thinking about it.
ReplyDeleteReading your post now, its remind me of the time, when my bf was emitted into ICU for 5 days before he passed away. There is a part of me that patiently wait for him to get well and another part of of me that wish he could end his misery. And life, everything can happen. And for that 5 days watching him lifelessly on the bed, depending on machine to breath, I cried every single moment I think about it, and its hard, for fear that he could have leave me any moment.
I'm really hoping that you will not need to face what I faced before. Hope miracle will happen, and soon he will be back smiling to you. Don't lost faith, keep praying.
hugs and loves.
nana....i m really sorry to know a out irsyad's condition...be tough nana...be tough..Allah knows best...
ReplyDeleteThanks supia. Unfortunately, I faced exactly what u did, only mine only took two days.
ReplyDelete@kuna, thanks.