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Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Worth of memories

I've been rummaging through my collection of pictures I've taken (and been taken) so far and I find myself looking at 'me' through my memories... 




Pictures are... capturing a moment in time... I found myself looking at pictures that worth a thousand words. I remembered those moments that were captured and remember myself being happy at that moment and I smiled. 




But looking at those moments also reminded me of the times beyond those moment.


Times when things gets harder, when things doesn't seem too bright and times when I got hurt a lot. Those times when you wish you doesn't exist, times when you wish you had everything and those times when you wish you were numb of all senses...



Then, I find myself wondering, in all those times I was down, Why had I never remembered those times that makes me smile? Through all the pain I've been through, why didn't the happy memories keeps me from dying inside? Had I been ignorant? Had I been blind? Or am I just really forgetful?



"Aaaah" I thought to myself... Maybe this is the reason I had these pictures. Maybe this is the reason, people capture those one moment in time... 







It's to remind them again, when they are down, there are happy memories... 
Despite the bleakness, there was once a light..


and we must never forget it, so that come what may, we would always be able to pick ourselves up - even when we're broken down to bits and pieces.


and smile :)


keep smiling alls,
from the Brat with Opinions,

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

A MAN man up and say sorry, BOY!

It is seriously frustrating and irritating when you have to deal with a man-boy. A man-boy I mean here is a male who is SUPPOSED to be mentally matured at their age (early twenties) and THINKS themselves as a full-fledge male and TRY to carry themselves as a man but in reality, they are mentally inadequate to act as one and thinks that the world revolves around them and nobody else mattered but themselves.


In other words an immature MAN who still thinks like a BOY.

Don't get me wrong, there are early-twenties guys who are refreshingly matured and very much reliable, in fact, I have come across a lot of them but in this post I'm talking about those who are not.

When I was in my late teens and even up until now in my mid-twenties, every now and then this type of man-boy will appear right in front of me. I have to admit, it is a delicious prospect for me to try and knock some sensibility into them but for each and every time, I find that dealing with man-boys are ultimately exhausting. Emotionally, physically, and mentally exhausting. Having a woman-girl who has little toleration with BSs at the side at that particular moment definitely does not help the situation (yeap my darling lil sis).

One characteristics shared by ALL man-boys I've met is they NEVER say sorry. What's worst is that they DO NOT know they are in the wrong or if they do, they just don't want to admit it.

I always find this very puzzling. What is so hard about saying sorry? It won't kill you, it won't hurt you, it won't make you look less. In fact, saying sorry makes you the BIGGER person. Saying sorry makes less people hurt (emotionally and perhaps physically). Saying sorry when it is appropriate to do so marks a MATURE and WISE man. 


Two most prominent time I have encountered this man-boy type was when I was 20 and just recently. For as long as I had known them, they had hurt my feelings numerous times, and they knew it. They had crossed the line for "joking" so many times and they knew it but they NEVER say sorry. Not even when I decided to walk away.

Five years ago, after being brutally beaten and hurt (emotionally) by a man-boy I decided to walk away from him. I decided that it was time for me to put myself first and not be hurt by him again (which I failed miserably). When we reconciled as friends, until the very end (I totally disconnected myself from him 2 years later) he never once said he was sorry to me - even when he admitted his wrong to his friend. He was hurt the way that he had hurt me and even worse both of the times, yet still he had never apologized to me.


Now, five years later, I found another man-boy. I am no longer that 18 years old girl who is so very excited with love and life but has little or no filtering for heartbreaks anymore. Thankfully, I had matured with age and know better than to hurt myself over a guy who is not worth my emotions.

But this was a different set of circumstances, because I am not romantically interested in him. He was more like a lil brother or a friend and I am merely an observer. I saw and witness all the things that the last guy did all over again - only this time I am not the recipient of those  cruel treatments. I try to warn the girls (yes there were more than one) about what they might be subjecting themselves to (in the most subtle way) but I know, I wouldn't be able to save them from the heartache I once felt. So I tried to drum in a little reasoning to the man-boy but unfortunately, like all man-boys, he just wouldn't listen and just blatantly REFUSE to see their wrong. So, even as a friend I too had to deal with the tantrums of this man-boy and let me tell you, it is damn FRUSTRATING. Just imagined, he had caused his cousin (who had an appointment with me) to be late for our appointment an hour and a half (which caused me and my sis wasted a good three hours waiting for the appointment), but still asked WHY he needed to apologize and WHAT wrong did he did!! (thanks to that, I now have a topic for my blog).

so for both times, I told them,

A real MAN man up and say SORRY when they are in the WRONG. You still have a LONG way to go, BOY! 
(the first time I added, call me only when you have GROWN UP!) 


Other (annoying, infuriating, exasperating) characteristics shared by man-boys,

They are BAD with promises
They are think everything revolves around them 
They think their feelings are the most important thing and others just don't have any feelings or if they do, it mattered less then theirs.
They think that the world and everyone else MUST follow or WILL follow their rhythm and will not subject himself to change it.
They think they are "old" enough.
They usually assumes they are the only one who is right.
Some of them also assumes that they are very knowledgeable in everything.
They can be heartlessly cruel
They seldom own up to their mistakes

Yet other (still annoying, infuriating, exasperating when combined with the above) better characteristics shared by man-boys,

They are good friends, who will go to lengths to help you (when they feel like it)
They are smooth talker (well, at least they know what to say at the right time)
They know how to please people (but some of them when people (especially girls) started to feel special with the treatment and care they showed, they will pull themselves out in the most cruel way)
They are curious, intelligent people (although their performance in studies vary on their level of commitment) thus they know a lot of things (usually unrelated to studies).
They are heart-throbs (whether they realize it or not) 


Through time, these man-boys do grow up. They will mature and by that time, be ripe for plucking. hahaha. And I must say that I'm looking forward to what kind of person they will bloom into. My only wish is for them to NOT TAKE A DAMN LONG TIME to do so!!!! lols~


Just a bratty thought from a brat with opinions,

Sunday, May 1, 2011

For them

This will be a long post of a special tribute to some special friends I met this past two years. They had just finished their studies and after this, I might or might never see them again after they all embark on their own journey. Since it's written specially for them, I decided to write this post in Bahasa.

Pernah tak, korang berkenalan dengan orang yang korang rasa korang kamceng gila, tapi sebenarnya bukanlah kawan korang?

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