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Friday, June 1, 2012

Being A Girl

Wow, I can't believe how long it has passed since I last wrote in this blog. Oh, don't get me wrong. I tried. I have a few drafts here, but somehow I didn't get to finish it. But, as Ernest (Bro don't like that la Bro) had so very kindly point it out to me, "the fairy populace in that daisy field needs to be kept in check". Now we won't want them to lose their spark and "fizzle" do we?

Being a girl.

It's not difficult.

It's not weird,

it's just what it is.

When I was much younger, (in school) I always despise being seen just as another girl. Well, I still do now - because I believe I am more than just "a girl", But back then, probably due to the notion of "girls are weak" "girls are lame" I just don't like when people (especially boys) refuse to do something or include me in games because I'm a "girl".

Well, yes, I do have the classic signs of a tomboy, except, I wasn't exactly one.

I wear my hair in ponytail (before I started to wear Hijab) and loves to wear skirt. I enjoy playing dress-up and I also enjoy playing masak2 and kahwin2 with my siblings and cousins. My mom's make-up is never safe from me and my sister's clutches and you know, all those girly things girl do, like playing with barbie dolls and stuff.

But, at the same time, I love to play in the dirt. I enjoy going to the stream behind my grandma's house with the boys, love to get up on the tree and pick some fruits, ride the bicycle out, playing catch, playing bottle cap and other games with the boys. I especially enjoy the arcade and the rides at a fun park and no - I've never liked the girly/kiddie rides - I always go for the extreme.

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So when guys just dissed me aside because I'm a "girl" I hated it. I really do.

But as I grew up, I started to appreciate being a girl. Somewhere along the way, I learned that it's ok for me to act and think like a girl. There's nothing bad or lame about being a girl. Sure, there are some restrictions but it's not so bad at all.

I had realized myself that there are somethings (as cool and fun as it seems) wouldn't look so good for a girl to do it. It may be social adjustment, or complying to what society thinks or believe, but nevertheless, I see it as it is. I started to see that some of the things that girls don't usually do are the things that doesn't really matter anyway.

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I see that, it is not so bad being the "weaker" one. It doesn't mean that I can't do it myself or that I can't survive if there are no guys doing it for me. But it is definitely nice to have them do it for me. It also makes life much easier. Sometimes, I find that, I let them do it because I like to see it. There is something somewhat flattering and endearing about guys who do things for girls (but not up to the extent of being a slave or queen control-ish kind of way).

Then I also started to see the limitations that is me.Not necessarily because I'm a girl, but more because I am just not as big or as strong as the boys. As "sturdy" as I like to believe I am, I know for sure that I have the stamina of an unfit 60 year old, and it doesn't help that I have asthma since I was 5. So I know, as much as I love extreme sport and hiking and just being rowdy and wild, I know I couldn't last long. It would take me twice as much time than my friends to finish a jungle tracking, So I never force anyone to wait for me, and I definitely warned them beforehand, I'll be slowing them down.

One of the perks of being a girl :p
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What I really hate is to be seen "JUST" as a girl. or "JUST" as anything. I believe that everyone is more that another "just".

I AM a girl - or maybe at this age, a woman. I AM a Muslim, I AM a Malay, I AM a Malaysian. THAT is just some part of who I AM. but that doesn't defines me - not totally.

I'm not a very feminist person. Yes, I believe that girls could excel just as much as guys in many things. But there are certain things that guys do much better - and look better at doing it than girls. I don't believe in "equality" because "equal" is not necessarily "fair". 

For example, how is it fair that a person who works twice as much and need the money twice as much coz they need to provide for a family of 11 gets "equal" amount of gain as someone who doesn't?
To be fair, people need to get what they need in proportion to how much they deserve it. 

I don't expect it, but I do like it very much when guys do things for me. Example, holding the door open for me, helping me with lifting things - even when I didn't ask for it. It's actually nice to be treated like a princess once in a while. (too much of it would be a bit tiresome though). I am an independent person. Had always been one. But it would be awesome to have someone I can depend on.

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Honestly, I have no idea what made me write this post. I'm not even sure where this post has just went to. It's probably the flu that I'm having right now that has just infected my throat and up to my head. Luckily I'm not on my PMS now. lol~

Ah well, hope u manage to wade through my post and sort-of enjoyed reading it. Uh Oh, I want to share something I found from the Net. I FIGHT LIKE  A GIRL! Damn right I do!

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A sick Brat,
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1 comment:

  1. haha! being a girl can grab boobs?! haha so funny la you! :D

    ReplyDelete

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