KAHWIN??

Marriage - was never really a big concern to me. I'd be lying if I say it NEVER crossed my mind. I pun manusia biasa jugak.. hehe. Sometimes while hanging out on my bed, on the way to la-la land, the thought did made a stop-by.

Especially recently when my lovely cousin cum sister, K.Asya is getting ready for her engagement ceremony. She's definitely on the track to the 'just married' - land. I wish her all the happiness in this world with her beloved Encik (it's a nickname we gave to her soon-to-be fiance /husband)

my lovely cousin

I am 24, yet I feel like I'm too young to get married. Heck, I still consider myself a 'brat'. lols. I guess it all comes down to a point that actually, I haven't found 'the ONE' that I want to spend the rest of life with - yet (self promoting to say, "hey, I AM SINGLE - for now") haha :p

Sometimes I wonder, would I want to be a working wife or not? If I look at it superficially (with no emotions attached) I would say yes. I would want to have my own career. Why you say? Let's look at this way, I WANT A LIFE. I am paranoid - I must be, because I considered, based on current statistic, who is to say that my husband won't leave me? I won't get a divorce? Or, he won't die before me? before I was ready? (which I think I never would be). Yes I know, it's negative thinking, (and ALLAH forbid it from ever happening) but to me it's only rational thinking. IF I make his life as everything I know, lived by and breathe in, when he's gone, WHAT do I HAVE left to fall back to?

I mean, if his friends, and networks is the only friends and network I have, when he's gone, will the connection stays or wither away with him? If he was my ONLY world, then what happens to it when he's no longer there? Will my world dies and crumbles along with him? Then, when one day we get tired of each other, will any of us be seeking out for others?

Thinking of the negative side of it scares me - a lot. So, I think (pure rationally) that I would need to have a career on my own, I believe that a couple needs some time away from each other. And working is a good outlet.

c

working women

BUT!! that is just me thinking rationally. On the OTHER side of it all, when I am so definitely in love with my husband, and then bore our child, I might even decide for myself to stay home - especially if my husband is very much more than capable to take care of us financially (in other words, he's RICH). While getting to know his world, I might find a place for me there, and decided that I am comfortable enough to be in that world of his and make my own connections, friends and world through his. When I think about it like that, 

"Hey, it might not be such a bad idea after all!"

I would love to have such a sweet marriage

yup, in this matter, I am ultimately UNDECIDED. Unlike my sister, Mimi, she's sure she wants to be with her beloved 24/7. where he goes, she goes. Good for her. As for me, I guess, I'll need to wait until I've found the ONE. hehe. 

my sis and her beloved

There's something more on my mind about this topic, tapi post ni da cukup panjang. So I'll add up later.

Again, just some thoughts from a brat with opinions

-Nana Eddy-