WARNING! - This is a long. wordy and serious post!
Supiaholic's rant on Dumb guys let their lower body control their mind, but dumber girls let the guy low body destroy their life couldn't be more dead on than it already is. I agree with the title 100% an thus the reason why I keep the title. Probably just being 18 she only have heard this kind of story once. Not for me though.. But she's not wrong. Being YOUNG never I repeat NEVER makes what one person is saying wrong.
The Brat had personally heard this kind of stories coming from brat's acquaintances and closed friends. It crushes my heart each time. And in crushing my heart, it never fails to make me angry as well.
The first story the Brat had encountered with was when she was the a year older than Supiaholic. She (the friend) was one of the closest friend that Brat had in school. After SPM, we got separated and rarely contacted each other. The next time the Brat heard from her was when she was pregnant. It took brat by such surprise that the Brat had no words of comfort, advice, or just anything to say. As a friend, the brat fails to do anything for her. All I can do was be there, and listen to her. It was heart breaking. But this friend was lucky her boyfriend was taking responsibility for her and so they got married.
Well, if you think getting married is a happy ending for couples like this, then please think again. The friend and her husband, being young had to forgo their studies to work. With nothing else but an SPM certificate as their landing, you can guess how hard that was. She had to live with a mother-in-law who don't really like her. They was so young and wanted to live their life, but they never had that chance. The situation only got a bit better for her and her mother-in-law when the child was born. But to this date, there was no marriage ceremony with friends and families and picture that most girls dreamed of for her.
The second story come from a personal close friend who the Brat takes as her brother. From now on, brat will refer to him as my brother. He was one of the most dashing guy Brat had ever known. He has great lineage and has a great personality to match with his looks. Oh, and he was a guy who loves her girl whole-heartedly despite whatever his friends are saying about his girl. That girl, broke his heart to pieces when she was pregnant with another, "older guy" child.
My brother, 21 at that time, had been with the girl for five years. Yes, they are high-school sweethearts. They had never gone more than holding hands and cuddling with each other. So, you can imagine what he felt like when she personally told him the news. She was crying, because the "older guy" didn't want to take responsibility for the child she is now carrying. My brother, who loves her unconditionally was prepared to take her and the child and marry her. And so, he and his family went to the girl's house to court her from her family - only to be humiliated when they refused the proposal because apparently the "older guy" had agreed to marry their daughter. After all the humiliation, not long after that, the girl's mother was practically stalking my brother to take her daughter back because the "older guy" changed his mind. I was so pissed off with the girl that I wish I could've personally meet her and slapped her for breaking my brother's heart that way. But I didn't because my brother's heart were already in pieces, there is no point in stepping on it more. I don't know what happened to her. But the mother keep bugging my brother until he changed his phone number 5 times! If you are wondering, my brother now is happily married to another girl, with their first child.
The third encounter was even more heartbreaking than that. By chance, I get acquainted with this girl. She was lagged in her studies (I wast taking my diploma then). In privacy, she told me that the reason she took leave from study was for abortion. ABORTION!!! I can't even start to describe what I was feeling back then. I was going to condemn her, but she was already in a bad state. The pregnancy was her stupidity in believing her boyfriend, she has no support from anyone and she has no confidence in herself. What makes it worst is that she stopped seeing herself as someone with any value and she has poor selection of friends. Her friends, to me are what best be described as enemy.
One night, she told me she was going out with a friend, accompanying her friend to meet her friend's boyfriend. Then, while texting with me, she suddenly went quiet. I didn't see her until three days after that. She told me she was gang raped by 5 guys who was her friend's boyfriend's friend. Her so called friend, left her there and went off to somewhere with her boyfriend. I remembered crying for her sake. I remembered being angry for her and AT her. I just didn't know what else I could do for her - because I had no proof and she refuse to tell me who her so called friend is and she don't even know where they took her that night. I felt utterly helpless. Come the next semester, she was gone from uni. I couldn't contact her and I never heard from her again.
All of these encounters makes me so angry with the stupidity of those involved. I don't just merely blame the guy because I know for a fact, it won't happen if the girl don't want it. Even if she was duped into believing him, she was at fault for letting her feelings cloud her judgement. It's a different story if it's forced rape.
I agree with Supaholic, SEX is definitely not a way to show commitment in love. Please, DO NOT believe all those magazines, movies, mangas or stories that you hear, watch, or read that says otherwise. They know NOTHING about you. and they don't CARE at all about what will happen to the people who believe them. Because the one that has to live with the consequences is not them, but YOU.
You might think that pre-marital sex is nothing, and it is the trend. You might think that it is okay, and it is fun. Try to think again if it would still be okay, in trend and fun if you got pregnant (or make someone pregnant) because of it. There is no 100% way to "safe sex". In fact, there is no such thing as "safe sex". If you are not thinking about yourself, then PLEASE think of your parents. Their shame. They might always be willing to accept you (if you are lucky to have one that do) but the ashes you smeared over their face, will never fade. If you can't think of your parents either then think of the child that you might be carrying. How are you to explain their lineage? How are you going to raise them up? Will they grow up normally? Will you and they receive support? Could you have the heart to rid of one innocent life? Could you be responsible for that life? If thinking of all these doesn't stop you, then allow me to be the one to say this, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO BE HUMAN! Remember, in sex, 1+1 does not equal to 2 or 1, it equals to 3.
Please realize, there should be a limit to stupidity. If you are someone who practices pre-marital sex and are reading this, know that I DO MEAN OFFENSE. I am not condemning the life you chose for yourselves, but I really do think that you are making a stupid choice. If you are so sure that they are THE ONE, then hurry up and get married already. If you are making excuses to not doing so, then think again, WHY are you making those excuses. It is up to you to take this as a friendly advice and reminder or as something you just couldn't care less. In the end, WE make OUR own choices - and WE have to live with it.
The brat with opinions,
"The brat's blog is the equivalence of rampaging in a field full of white daisies whilst riding a velociraptor, straddling a bazooka on my shoulder and causing mayhem amongst the fairy populace whilst shouting curse words at my old high school magazine! oh, and magic sky juice!" - Ernest, dontlikethatbro.blogspot.com
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Yes Nana, I agree that we make our own choices and live with it - we learn form our mistakes, improve and move on with life. That's life~ ^^
ReplyDeleteI read your story and stood still for a moment.
ReplyDeleteI like this "in sex, 1+1 does not equal to 2 or 1, it equals to 3."
Sometimes, we cannot blame others for that also, both side should take the responsible. Every time I hear story like this I feel angry, everyone should read this. To know the consequences of pre-marital sex.
Important note: from now on, I'll always visit your blog. Please don't hesitate to visit me. Let's be more than just followers...let's be faithful readers! Thanks :)
ReplyDeleteLovers' Shore
http://lovers-shore.blogspot.com/
I couldn't agree more (: Nice wordy post, I like it.
ReplyDeletei seen this post on other blog.. haha copy ye?
ReplyDeletei'm visiting you back
@hilda thanks
ReplyDelete@mizi - you must've read it from Supiaholic. I'm not copying, I'm linking. I attributed the post to her numerous times XD
salam..hi nana ^^
ReplyDeletewoohhh..a very emotional post
n yup im feeling so0o sympathy with ur bro..
cam bese LOL
"ble pompuan tu beik,laki yg mslh n ble laki DAH BAIK pompuan plak yg jd mslh!"
the world is always FAIR N SQUARE rite..
btw,
A REALLY NICE ENTRY here..